Installing ZOS (An open-source metaphysical operating system)

You want to access the mulitverse without being susceptible to malware, and with a whole lot of built-in functionality? Do you want to see what's going on up there for yourself? Then follow the instructions below to install a workable mental operating system that I designed myself for proper travel of the multiverse. Be warned! There are a lot of scary people up there, and scary viruses that will get you and won't let go.

All right, so here we go.

1) Imagine two dots. Little dots that are a distance apart.

2) Try to connect them. You won't be able to--the colored line will bend away from the dot like it's a bolt of lightning. Everyone is different, and everyone will have different reactions to this step. Here are a few tricks to connecting the two dots.
a) Thread the needle. Think of the first dot as the starting point of the line, and the second dot as a needle that needs to be threaded.
b) The Black Hole Trick: think of the second dot as a black hole, and then spin the line around it until it falls into its event horizon. To pull that trick off, you have to catch it by surprise.
c) The swallower: have the line swallow the dot. Not sure how this one works--haven't tried it for reals yet.

3) Once you have the dots connected, run a sheath over the colored line. It should be black, but it can be any color as long as it is opaque.

4) Connect those two dots with more dots, until you can perform the connection quickly and without trouble. Then, explode! Connect as many dots to each other as you can, using explosions--it will feel like your mind is expanding. Repeat until you can't anymore, and your whole brain looks like a briar patch.

You have just installed the basic requirements for a metaphysical operating system: neural control. It should feel a little bit exhausting.

5) Start at the number one. Imagine it standing against a black background, and pull it down as if it were a sticker. You should see a small red bulb behind it. It may feel as if someone is watching you. Don't worry. This is normal. (What we're doing here is the same thing a printer does when it obtains a new batch of ink. We're taking your OS for a test drive.)

6)Try the number three. Look for landmarks that make you feel, emotionally. You will run the gamut of emotions when you search for these landmarks--everything from laughter to fear to amazement.

7) Count up, and up, and up--and eventually, once you have the hang of visualizing psychic objects, just input the "psychic URL" of my game hub into your mind. It looks like:

Visualize this in your head, making sure that you feel like you're actually connecting to something. Get over the feeing that you're making it all up or that I'm putting images in your mind--see what your mind wants you to see.

8) Talk to people. Check out the construction site--the alpha version of the game I'm building. Or, you could visit the former Mount Olympus (Now abandoned due to radiation and covered in fecal matter). You can also head to Asgard. You can visit any of the gods you want to see--they are a dangerous bunch, though, so you have to be careful. They will turn you into mushrooms, or suck out your life force. Again, they are not a friendly bunch unless you have something to offer them.

9) PM me by messaging the username "Zebobez." I can show you around--and even let you help with the game I'm building. However, I will only have a second conversation with someone who confirms their contact of me with an email to minerzep@gmail.com, including a summary of what our conversation was about. Otherwise, I have no way to know if you're real.

10) Once you pass the "are you real" test (And have gotten over your sceptacism about a telepathic MMO) we can hang out, have fun, party up, and design games and cities.

And that's it! Have fun!